Life changes are celebrated in society with public rituals such as baby showers, graduations, weddings, retirement parties, and funerals. There are many ways to continue to incorporate the memory of your loved one in celebrations as well as in your every day life.
- Establish a routine
Everyday rituals give you a sense of structure and personal control and help to relieve the tension and confusion of grief.
- Identify the most difficult time of your day
Use this time to do something that is comforting to you.
- Share memories with family and friends
Instead of trying to push away memories of your loved one, encourage others to share their memories with you. You may also want to consider making a scrapbook of photographs or cards. Many make quilts or stuffed animals from clothing that once belonged to their loved ones.
- Light a remembrance candle
Lighting a candle is a public or private way to say "I care and remember." You may wish to do this at a special time of the day or chose to do it on your loved one's birthday or anniversary of death.
- Donate to a Charity
Creating a scholarship fund, donating books to a library or giving to a charity with special meaning are additional ways to keep your loved one’s memory alive.
- Sponsor a special fundraising event
Silent auctions, golf scrambles, music events are ways to raise money in the name of your loved one and increase awareness of support for special causes. You may also participate in a walk or race to honor your loved one.
- Share family heirlooms
Often items with small monetary value have great sentimental value.
- Place flowers at your place of worship
This can be done at birthdays, anniversary date, holidays or other meaningful days.
- Write in a journal or write poetry
- Plant a Tree
Create a butterfly garden or memorial flower garden. Taking time to commune with nature provides a time for reflection. If your loved one had a special tree or flower, create a garden in memory of things that brought joy both of you shared.
Rituals do not always have to be done publicly. You may want to do something that is just for you, something that is a special way to connect with your loved one and embrace the love you shared. This might include wearing a special piece of jewelry that belonged to your loved one on their birthday or anniversary date of their death. You may choose to wear a special piece of clothing to a significant event as a way to include your loved one in the festivities and keep them close. Think of ways to remember the love you shared and do something meaningful to you.
